Aiyan Turley
Bio
Returning to Innocence to my Soul for I have lost it through trauma
Remembering the golden timeline of any moments of my life
Renewing myself every day since each day is a Blessing
Rewinding the Ambrosia of my Love
Run, but do not fear
Stories (17/0)
Flawed memory
When was the time that you felt unloved or the insignificance of your own weight of a value because of someone else’s actions? I recall the most recent one from my ex of on and off and so on and forth of a partner whom we finally dissipated through a physical ordeal. Oftentimes, he would make comments and slight or passive phrases such as my body shape or weight or stretch marks from all the way in 2019. Yes, he was one of those types of people who religiously has to have all things and people in order and precisely in his likings. I, on the other hand, did not do so and had no clue that he would actually measure his own waistline?
By Aiyan Turley2 years ago in Humans
Self-acceptance
There is no one to scrape you off the freshly painted cement ground when your own inner feelings of turmoil mixed with tornados are being churned and then planted onto the ground. Sometimes, it is best to simply breathe in and close your "window to your soul" or eyes and exhale the sewage of whatever you are feeling at the moment. As for me, the utmost trifling and tantalizing trauma was with the most recent findings in my cervix. Yes, I typed it and said it loud and clear as my moonstone; my cervix was diagnosed positive with abnormal cells or (HPV).
By Aiyan Turley2 years ago in Confessions
Tainted love recyled
For those days that glistens with freshly brewed teardrops are the frozen glaciers to my despair. The short twelve days that I have been back in the PNW or the State of WA was a mere slight eye slicer to my heart. At times, the fresh bergemot (Earl Grey) scented tea seeped through my nostrils as well as your absence in my demice.
By Aiyan Turley2 years ago in Humans
Unwanted
Unwanted The first time I felt like a trash bag, blown away drifting and stained with filth and holes was the day I watched her go. Every year the celebration of the great existence and sacrifices of mothers around the world gets gifts, love, and appreciation from their daughters and sons. Nothing indents deeper than having the notion of being unwanted by their mothers. Each year the gradual residue of her absence became the shield of my pain. Many times we forget the damaged particle within us by pretending they are dead.
By Aiyan Turley2 years ago in Confessions
Unveiling my resentment
The day is bitter cold with a dash of skin tingling nostalgia from the brief glimpse of a dream of my classmate, tyler. My thoughts have been in a dirty rut of that sludge feeling since I cannot seem to get over how hateful I behaved with Farzin. It has been one of those eerie and damp feelings because my mind kept on replaying how dreadful it feels like to have imploded at him. The news of my positive results of hpv of course did not help an ounce at all and my breathing is shallower and much more rapid and harder to inhale without the urge to cry.
By Aiyan Turley2 years ago in Humans
No longer waiting for Doomsday
As the game of life transcends into multidimensional facets; the rises and falls of my relational realms shifted yet again. The first glance of Farzin remained an encapsulation of years of longing arms wrapped in a demure smile. It was the beginning of December in 2019 and at that trivial time; I was taking care of my dad due to his recent stroke sand the dissolution of his restaurant. At the time, I was residing at the house with my dad and Farzin rented the extra room; (my old room) to be exact.
By Aiyan Turley3 years ago in Viva
Un Breakup
The drownings of my thoughts as our strands of the hands of time drips away and my heart still couldn't perceive how much has consumed my mind these past three weeks. Some will strongly agrees that any break ups are meant to be left behind and in the rear view mirrors. Somehow and somewhere, our departure has landed me into the web of bitter sweet tinge of bewilderment and conflicted feelings.
By Aiyan Turley5 years ago in Poets
Anonymous
A walk and stroll can be as platonic and placid to some and yet, to others; it is a portal to restart something that shall stain my mind. The day was like any other day and it was the vague notions of how a mundane moment can be changed by someone purely from a stroll at the trail. It was only a week since we met in this borderline strange situation and somehow, your presence induces me to ponder about what the meaning of life truly entails.
By Aiyan Turley5 years ago in Poets
Mr. Grey
The memory of you instills an ocean of deepness that penetrates farther than the intercourse of our minds. It was one of the returns of what it felt like when we met again in your hometown where I fell into you last May. Through the winds of despairs and the lingerings of what was not said and unfinished, your number found me again by an accident.
By Aiyan Turley5 years ago in Humans
Altered Mind
The un-battered woman within me was indented onto me when every shreds of my dignity collapsed. Solace of my soul reflected the fractures of my molecular shameful truth of what betrayal truly was. Many times we may have failed and fallen to the concrete ground of cold and hardened truth to the reality of how an altered state of mind signifies. For many years of unshedding and untwining myself, it finally took an earnest turn of no edge when I felt that prickling fear of losing my daughter, Emerson.
By Aiyan Turley5 years ago in Psyche
Nena
Heart beats trembling and treacherous effects, drippings of excitement as I press the "follow" button, hoping that you will not recognize me or even ignores my request. The floods of memory comes storming into my mind as I stared into the white screen and waited silently, but tornados of emotions travelled through me like an electric convulsion.
By Aiyan Turley5 years ago in Families