Tea with Your Mental Monsters

I’m diving deeper and getting to know my demons,

sharing tea with them.

I’m analyzing them deeply

as others try to do with me.

Objectively,

I know you’re unselfish,

you’re trying to help me.

You want to be the safety net

I don’t have outstretched from anyone else.

Subjectively,

I just see how easily

you’ve pranced through your life.

Supported so that you could learn

to stand on your own

and never truly fear falling.

You weren’t thrown out

on the ice to find the strength in your legs

not to slip and collapse.

The door wasn’t locked behind you.

I’m diving deeper,

getting to know the ugliest parts of me.

Jaded, illogical, glittering under the sun.

I can’t let go

of the way I’ve struggled.

And since I’ve never had a hand

to hold me up before,

I’m still learning how to hold on to yours.​