I'm Sorry

I'm sorry I let you down

I'm sorry i let those words fall out of my mouth like a raging waterfall

I'm sorry the weight of my guilt and cowardice was heavy enough to crush your innocence

And leave you wondering where it all went wrongAnd if there's anything you could have done

I'm sorry I'm not brave enough to confront the very intimacy that I crave and shudder in fear ofI'm sorry the Christmas lights in your eyes weren't bright enough to light the path back to my contentmentI tried to stay on the straight and narrow and ended up on a path with no lights at all

A path dark enough to swallow the brightest ember in my heart that sustained my heartbeat

I thought the burning wick that brought my soul warmth was self sustaining

But I've come to realize you were the fuel it needed

And now here I am, stranded on the shore of my conscience

Wondering where the path back to your trust lays

Or if its been consumed by the same malevolent darkness that plagues my tongue

A darkness made up of broken promises and the hopeful dreams of a first time lover

I can still feel the electricity of your lips when I confront the thunderstorm raging in my mind

It rains down on my happiness with the same force as the waterfall I unleashed on yours

I don't fight it though, I just hope it passes soon