A Brief, Yet Lovely Light

In my darkest days and darker nights. Alone in the bitter cold I stood. My fingers, numb and lifeless, held onto the only possession I could not give up to the whistling winds and the ruthless ice. In my hand, I clutched a candle stick. Carved from my own spirit encasing one of my heart strings, it held a flame only for mere moments. Taken away by the merciless cold I had become accustomed to; yet fought for the hope of warmth. I walked along the snowcapped roads in search of a spark to light my candle.

The only heat I found lay flickering upon the disintegrating candles that had been tested by time. Fighting to stay alive yet fading into the night air. I united my candle with the fading glory. The flame attached itself to my awaiting wick. It burned slowly as if to get aquatinted with my eager torch. When it seemed to glow as brightly as I’d hoped, the jealous cold wisps away my awakened wick. Oh, woe is me; shunned again by the unrelenting wind who exiled my flame from existence. I pressed upon my journey to find the flame to light my candle stick. I wandered for what seemed to be a lifetime. Scorned and scorned again I was by the bitter end of every flame. Extinguishing my hope for light before the sparks could even ignite. Oh, woe is me.

Until. A match. A broken match, but a match none the less. Found upon the mantle of a forgotten lantern. My frozen finger tips fought for feeling as I try and strike the match upon my heel. At first it seemed a fool’s dream to ignite such a small match. But then I see hope. Within this lantern laid yet another dying flame; comforted only by the embers that encase it underneath the ashes of the past. I stuck the match under the embers, in the hopes that whatever lay dormant within this shattered lantern may be reawakened and given new life. It burned! By God it burned! The match so small and frail. To hold a flame so dim and fading. To light a candle so dead and crudely carved. By the grace of God, it burned. At last my efforts were not for nothing. The burden of darkness was no longer mine to bear. The corners of my heart are filled with life. My fingers thawed and fresh with feeling. My chest on fire with passion. My eyes adjust to the light I thought impossible for me. At last my dream has come to fruition. I lived again through this wick, this torch, this candle that burns as bright as the sun I thought long since burned out of the very sky. At last my candle burned with purpose. Again, I say, I love.

And then a shiver. The cold air from the north ran down my spine. The carnivorous cold moved swiftly through my hair and enveloped me within its icy grasp. It sought the flame. It sought my heart. It yearned to kill my new-found spark. My life, it lusts to conquer. So many before me, I was but another lamb for the wolf of winter to devour. It had stalked me for so long. Its jaws soaked with anticipation. Its tail wags in excitement. Its eyes fixed on the burning tip of my crude candle stick. It howls as it blew over me; Taunting me. I tried to shield my heart from the bitter fangs of darkness. My fingers became numb. My lungs deprived of air. I was driven to my knees as I try to guard my flame from extinction and then…It’s out.

My eyes widened with disbelief. My heart sunk into the snow. My head hung low in defeat. I am beaten. Again, I am alone. Again, I am without warmth with my heart. Again, I am forced to continue without illumination. Again, I am consumed by darkness. Again, I walk blinded. As I press upon the trail unknown to find a flame for my withered wick. I will always remember the love I had for the flames I’ve lost and the candle I carry within my chest. I will always long for that feeling of triumph over the darkness. I will always love that brief, yet lovely light.

I wrote this piece back in 2011. Really surprised I was able to hold onto it this long. Parts of it still feel relevant but that's the beauty of longevity. Glad it retained its value! If you enjoy it please like and share! Follow me on Instagram @Deuce_theWise