Your Darkness

When it gets dark at night I think about how you do not love me.

So when I can not get you off my mind I rip apart my body.

It is the only thing left that heals the pain

The burning keeps me from going insane

I love how my blood turns into art

I love how destroying my body heals my heart.

You are so beautifully angry.

But in your arms, you have made me.

I crave your destruction.

Your wonderfully shaped seduction.

Sometimes I wonder what I am supposed to be.

I look in the mirror and question what I am supposed to see.

I could get lost in a world with no mirrors.

No reflections getting clearer.

I can not sleep at night.

Me and your darkness are battling, and I did not win the fight.

This is a combination of poems I wrote while in a horribly toxic relationship I was in before my husband. Growing up in an abusive home, toxic was all I had ever known. I thought that was just how people loved. I thought that toxic was equivalent to passionate. I am telling you, it is not. Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you haven't already, visit my profile and read my other work.