Who Am I?

Who am I? Well I'm not really sure. I'm 15, a sophomore, a Taurus. I'm not really sure what much else there is. What do you mean that's not enough? What were you expecting? A warmhearted manifesto pulled straight from my chest leaving me vacant, left to rest in this cold isolated place. Lost at sea, lost on land, lost in time, lost in the deepest depths of my mind where all is a barren wasteland filled to the brink with plain words engulfing me in this tidal wave of thoughts. I'm stuck in this maze of a mind. I ask for directions yet I deny all routes given. While all bystanders point out. I travel in, I travel in, I travel in Searching for a map that hasn't been created. left alone, left to think, left to ponder my very existence by you asking me that very question But Who I am and what I want varies by how many stars I can see in the city skies. Varieties of traits combining creating a constellation too large, too big, too much to comprehend. Never being able to connect the stars back to myself again. And suddenly, I feel nothing. my consciousness empty And my body numb. And I start to freak. Do I have control over my strength and state of mind Or does nothingness control me and the decisions I make at this point in time? Until I'm counting down the Days, Hours, Minutes, Seconds. And I can't speak. And I stutter. And I'm locked in, Stuck on the bathroom floor. How can I control my life when it's myself telling me otherwise. All I can do is feel nothing, And wish to feel something soon.