What I Really Wanted to Say

Every day I check your horoscope

what I really mean is I like you

What I really mean is

When we touch it feels like there’s a hummingbird inside my chest

Whose wings flutter against my heart strings so rapidly

My whole body begins to shake

I can feel the burned traces of your fingertips on my back and chest

Like a smoldering campfire too stubborn to burn out

You and I are two pieces of the same puzzle different kids are playing with and I am in a sandbox somewhere while you are rolling down the slide

But I hope that when their parents call out to them they put us back in the box just to be close

Even if we are unfinished.

Every day I check your Facebook

What I really mean is I wait to hear from you

What I really mean is if you are water, then time is Egypt and I am the slave roaming for however long I have to until I can drink you in

You hold me in the palm of your hand like a snowflake and I melt instantly against your warmth

the wetness of me lasts even after I’m gone

But I hope you turn the air conditioner on so I can freeze against your skin just to feel you a little bit longer

You are the alchemist turning everything to gold

And now silver isn’t good enough

Every day I go home

What I really mean is we live separate lives

What I really mean is I wish we didn’t.