Trying to Understand

So stay with me for a second,

There's a life I can’t explain

Not the worst, flaws galore and sometimes instead of vacant I'm “help needed”

How do you explain to the world not understanding

Not understanding their traditions

Their journey,

Their happiness or sadness

How do you tell people you don't know the president or prime minister

Yes you learn and thank god you can make your own ideas unbiased and unfiltered

But sometimes not being a part is harder

Not understanding that Christmas feeling

When a girl in school says happy birthday

And all I can reply is

“Is it?”

I can't say this was the end of me

Or ruined my life

I can only say it's not a big deal

I don't know better

I had unachievable dreams which got washed away by reality

And replaced with goals which I know I can reach

And a life I now control

But sometimes

I wish I could understand