"Triggered"

I'm triggered cause I thought you were the one but it was an illusion which came with confusion and had me losing myself while I placed my self-worth on the shelf. Every day I looked in the mirror and things still didn't become clearer until I stop listening to your words and focused on your actions now I'm contemplating and asking how did I sink so low where did my self-esteem go. As I lie here on the bed with "triggered" on replay my disappointments constantly playing in my head. I'm triggered when you text my phone, triggered that I let you give me false hope and left me feeling used discarded unable to process the hurt until the door that led me to you was finally closed. But, your soul is still connected to mine as I can still feel your kisses on my lips and spine. I'm triggered cause I knew my worth but let myself down when I chose to indulge knowing the consequences of the path I chose. So am I really triggered or feeling played that for you myself I betrayed.