Heartbreak was the fire that heated the forge in my heart,
Hardening it in that strong alloy, encasing it in a metal so strong that no one could shatter it.
Hellfire that burns the soul, forged this cardial case,
And though it may seem to you, that I am losing my soul, that the metal surrounding my heart is becoming cold and giving me the mannerisms of a lizard, It's just my shell, my protection.
The guard I keep up when I exit my home, entering the world, where my peaceful nature freezes over, and my tranquillity dissipates as I enter the city, the arena flooded with millions trying to survive, to compete in world that up close feels so dystopian when you're so afraid of vulnerability.
The noise is fanatical, as people are running, shouting, colliding into each other, as I stand there,
Breathing, in and out, in and out, my fists clench as I try to stop myself feeling like I'm drowning on land, feeling like bungee cords are rapping themselves tighter, and tighter around my ribcage,
I open my eyes, trying to move forward to my destination, the colour returning to my face, as my heart rate drops, as the cold wind refreshes my skin and restores the air to my lungs.
I can power through, music playing in my brain,
Making me feel like I'm the centre of this arena,
About to take on the world, my hands touching the dirt, before I get up and move forward,
“I'm no longer Hollow Bones!” I scream in my mind, as I try to fight those demons in my brain, the lone gladiator versus Pluto’s minions, the insecure parts of my brain, I'm trying to rise above the demons who locked my heart in metal, and though I thought that metal casing made me feel stronger, It also filled with me with rage, making me more afraid to be myself,
But here I can be,
I can remove the case of my heart, and release this pain,
When Theatre doors swing,
The play's the thing,
The one arena that is my escape,
The fear I can face,
When I've got that role that I embrace,
A character I can relate to,
Who whispers in my ear “we know what are, but not what we may be”
The lights come up, the play begins,
It's time for me to remove the alloy that seals my heart, as I embrace the light and embody the part.