I want so much for myself,
Is that selfish of me?
I want this bright lit apartment
Full of blankets and crystals hanging in my windows
I want mugs and a record player
I want a beautiful satin robe hanging on a hook near my bed
And roses in vase on the table beside it
I want paintings all over my walls
And warm water for chai, always boiling
I want rosewater and ivy scented candles forever burning
And endless beautiful handmade soaps to choose from
I want sweet smelling perfumes with flowers soaking inside of the fragrance bottles
And I want sweet honey in my cabinets
And I want this love
This growing, consistent love
I want to run my fingers through his beard
I want to curl up with him in the mornings while we listen to Santo and Johnny
Focus on my caramel fingers
Laying on his milk colored chest
I want to make him laugh
And kiss him whenever I want
I want to stumble in and out of local bars
And walk home with him, drunk
I want to feel safe in his embrace
I want this beautiful life
That's simple...that's gentle
I've created this never-ending luxury in my mind
This wonderful paradise that doesn't yet exist
And yet there I stay, keeping reality out
Is that wrong?
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