“Shifting”

Longing for change

what change…not sure

A short time ago, contentment was in arm’s reach

Now the harder I try, the further away it runs

Is this a new excursion? Should I beware?

Or are desires pushing their way through, fighting after being held down inside for so long?

Struggling, grappling with the thought of the forbidden “unexplored territory”

Am I living for the surety of others, afraid to find my way?

Knowing as I do that my love for the current and all that it entails, won’t be ripped from me, yanked from me like highly anticipated love letters

No

I will indefinitely love you, life

Just in a different perspective, with a new outlook

Priorities change, desires, contentment, and happiness

Happiness? That’s a thought

Still happy, I digress to say that the joy of day to day life is taken away

Looking around, wondering, “Is there change?”

Should there be? Will there be? Is the change mine to initiate?

Surely I hope, as my heart yearns for newness

New surroundings, new people, new experiences

Dare I say, New me?

Is presumptuous my name? Am I wanting it all too quickly? Am I desiring what is not rightfully mine, and what will never be?

Perhaps I am a victim of what is taken in through the holes on my face?

Am I longing only for what I see others enjoying around me?

Somewhat, I’m sure

All is natural, all has been dreamed up in times past

What I feel then, is really mine…it’s from me

The question now shall be…

How do I acquire what is rightfully mine to take?

How do I shake these feelings of guilt for wanting what is natural?

Hesitation, why do you have such a firm hold on me?

Do you want to deem me miserable? Is this a challenge?

Alas! One that shall be answered

Resolutions for plans ahead

You will not get me down

I’ve cast you out!

Taking hold of you by the neck and shaking you off

My happiness, my joy, will not be robbed

I keep them on me like a warm sweater in winter, realizing that happiness doesn’t leave when change arrives

It remains, shifting focus, but always being alive

Realizing change can be for the better

Realizing I can stop change never

*AshleiNichole*