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I had to kill a part of myself
To survive in their world
I had to play the part
At least to the best of my abilities.
They didn’t care it left me dead on the inside
My heart turned grey
Like a rotten prime rib roast
They preferred the dead on the inside version of me
And it has taken years
Of me walking in a haze
I barely made it out in one piece
But somehow I did
So now at 27 years old and
I’m rediscovering my 12 year old self
The version of me that they forced me to change
The Tom boy
Who only like boys as friends
Otherwise they were just plain annoying
The girl who had short hair
And wore boys clothes because they were more comfortable and just felt right
That poor girl
Who has been lost from me for so long
The one who knew exactly who she was
And wasn’t afraid to let anyone know it
The girl who fought for her passions
And did what she wanted without anyone’s approval
How could anyone
Want to hide her