Remember

I'm sitting here listening to Lana Del Ray

Trying to think of what to say

Because it is 2 am and I am not okay

I can't get you out of my mind

Even though we haven't talked in years

Remembering the sound of your voice still brings me to tears

Constantly, I worry about you

Mostly because I remember what the teacher assigned you as for the Christmas play at school

Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer

Oh look.. Another tear

Don't worry, it's a happy tear

Not like you care

When I would tell you my problems, all you'd do is stare

Never trusting me enough to share

So, I stopped crying on your shoulder

Because it felt like talking to a bolder

But for some reason, even though I know you're out there somewhere breaking laws

I'd still defend you, saying, "Everyone has flaws."

Because I still remember you singing very off key to 'How to Love'

Just for me

I remember your little sister

I wonder how big she's grown

I'm remembering all of this alone

Because I'm pretty sure that you've forgotten my name

And how lucky you are to remain the same

A couple years ago, I met a boy

Just like you- even looks like you

So much like you that at first.. I thought it was you

He even, just like you, treats girls like me like toys

But I can't talk to him like I talked to you

Because his eyes look like your eyes

And I can't handle remembering how everyday you looked into mine and found it so easy to lie

The hardest part about remembering you is remembering that we were never together

So, you're lucky

You've found your treasure

While I am cursed to always remember

Our non-existent forever.