Raging Battle

Raging battle!

Sleep, eat, concentrate

Things that should be an instinct and do everyday.

For some yes...

Endless nights, binge eating, not eating at all, can’t even remember the date of the day let alone a conversation that happened 40 seconds ago.. other days.

(BAD DAYS)

mind is racing so fast it’s hard to keep track..

work family marriage bills

Repeating over and over in your brain, reliving every conversation that happened that day every moment where you think you could have done something differently. Reassuring yourself that you are okay and that no one is thinking you're weird, stupid, annoying, unattractive.

Looking in the mirror not knowing who is staring back at you—sometimes a thin beautiful woman, other times a fat, everything flawed girl who can’t fit in anywhere she goes.

You can’t stop it... some days are mild you feel normal even peaceful. The majority of the time it’s as if you're in a horror movie getting replayed over and over again thinking you will never wake up.

A mask covers everything up

for no one can know what’s really going on inside. Smiles, giggles, picture perfect!

INSIDE:

Sitting in a wooden chair wrapped with chains, locks, blindfold, tape around your mouth.

It must remain silent. Letting it out would cause looks or worse rejection. Can’t have that!!!! Keep your body and mind occupied. Don’t unlock the door if someone sees for a slight sec hold your breath and smile. No crying no screaming no opening the door.

If anyone asks

“I’M FINE”