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My Pain for Yours

16 Years with My Best Friend

By Teya HooperPublished 6 years ago 2 min read
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I remember running home, so excited to see you.

Opening the door to your sweet face and wagging tail.

I drop my stuff in my room, ignoring the homework I needed to do,

Because showing you love was more important than a pass/fail.

I’d lie on my stomach, my arms crossed beneath my chin,

Looking up at you as you stretched to meet me on the floor.

You’d nuzzle my face and a smile would begin,

Moments like these were what I adored.

Fast-forward 16 years,

The fur on your face has tints of grey,

While it has become sparse on your ears.

Your back legs are frayed,

The use of them nonexistent,

Along with your eyesight.

Worst of all, was seeing your mind go,

It broke my heart into a million shards.

You’d move in circles so slow,

The struggle of walking, of how hard

It was for you.

Was I bad owner?

Could I have done something?

I questioned myself over everything.

I tormented myself over and over.

Finally I had to make that decision…

I had to “play God”…

I couldn’t keep watching, I gave in..

My heart was breaking,..

But it was what was best for you.

I knew this deep down,

I just couldn’t accept that that’s what we had to do,

Tears fell over my frown.

The night before, I think you knew.

You had snuggled on the couch with me,

And you nuzzled me like you used to do.

I cried as I held you, cherishing these last few moments.

We made eye contact and you nuzzled me again,

My heart was breaking but yours was mending,

Because you knew you’d be free of pain.

I had to rip my own heart and soul,

so you could have yours back.

And though the tears don’t seem to stop,

And though it’s been about a month now.

You remind me every night that I did the right thing,

Because your tail is wagging when I see you in my dreams.

And I’m grateful when I see you that way,

It lets me know that my pain took yours away.

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