Poets is powered by Vocal creators. You support Alina Gallupe by reading, sharing and tipping stories... more

Poets is powered by Vocal.
Vocal is a platform that provides storytelling tools and engaged communities for writers, musicians, filmmakers, podcasters, and other creators to get discovered and fund their creativity.

How does Vocal work?
Creators share their stories on Vocal’s communities. In return, creators earn money when they are tipped and when their stories are read.

How do I join Vocal?
Vocal welcomes creators of all shapes and sizes. Join for free and start creating.

To learn more about Vocal, visit our resources.

Show less

Married to Anxiety

My Relationship with Anxiety

The lashing words bite at me.

He throws them with skill,

aiming for the right spots to tare me down.

Why can't he see me for me?

Why doesn't he see what I am, who I am?

He only sees what I could be, how I could be better.

I am someone,

I will amount to something,

I am good enough.

But the words keep coming,

sounding over and over in my head.

The doubts creep in,

scurrying through my brain like diseased rats.

Maybe I should be more,

maybe I should be better,

I'm not good enough.

Would-be arguments clog my throat,

I swallow hard.

Begging the tears not to come,

not to prove him right. 

I am not weak.

Never once has he told me that I'm beautiful,

that he's proud of me.

I settle for backhanded compliments and sarcastic remarks.

Sometimes he says he loves me,

but I know they are empty words to him.

Does he put more meaning into the harsh ones?

I sit and listen to the track playing over and over in my brain.

The only thought that pushes through,

I am something, I am.


Like what you read? Please consider leaving a tip so I can keep writing and bringing you more content!

Alina Gallupe
Alina Gallupe

I am a graduate student studying Mental Health Counseling in Cambridge, MA. Long time reader and novice writer. I strive to combine my mental health knowledge and my love of writing to explore all topics related to the human experience. 

Now Reading
Married to Anxiety
Read Next
Come as You "Aren't"