Love me first.

I wanted our love to be freedom. My Pacific Coast. My highway to pure paradise.

I wanted to ride with you, feeling the wind in my hair and the sea salt air in my lungs.

I wanted to star gaze with you, counting our love in the sky. How impossible.

I wanted feel your fingers intertwine with mine, a complicated feeling desired so dearly.

I wanted to kiss you so deeply.

I wanted to feel the sparks of Fourth of July in your gaze.

I wanted to fall asleep in your arms, fields of lavender.

I wanted to feel your heart beat with mine. Synchronizing as one.

I wanted to get lost in your Summer vibe. Your free spirit.

I wanted to share my world with you, although I couldn’t give you the earth.

I wanted to love you.

But I need to love me first.

I need to rebuild myself. My soul and world crumbling.

I need to heal. My heart torn apart.

I need to learn. Too many mistakes made.

I need to care for myself. I am hurting.

I need to stay strong. To be my own rock.

I need to move on. Life is impatient. So I shall be as well.

I need to love myself. Because I know you won’t.