I don’t know why
Even the kindest words
Compliments
Endearment
Meaningful
Genuine
words
Sound so empty.
But words of anger
triggered reaction
Ugly words
Insults
Sound so full.
Why is it that the words
Meant to hold no value
Are the ones that stick
But the words full
of likeness and love
Are forgotten
Brushed off
Unbelieved
Brushed off.
~~~
I have always been a soft person.
Kind to everyone, loving.
Never confrontational.
Which is why at that point I knew
That these people have triggered I side of me I have never met
A side of me so angry and hurt
That they would be willing
To physically harm another person.
~~~
People question how I am so
Kind
And how I love
Unconditionally.
But how do you not
Offer your whole heart to the world
When for so long
All you needed
Was for someone to hand you their’s?
~~~
I like to think that I am the type of person
Who always fights for people
For their love
And for a place in their lives.
Perhaps I have fought all the wrong times
And gone exhausted to
The battles
That really mattered.
~~~
“What can you picture yourself doing with your life?”
I don’t know
Because
For so long
I never thought
I would live to the age
Where I had to choose
What to do with my life
~~~
“I need you
because without you i
don’t feel complete
or as happy
your hold melts away my
anger and stress
I need you
Because you are home to me.”
You didn’t need me when you allowed her to
Seduce you
Take over your body
And your mind.
I bet you didn’t even think of me
When you dove in
Between her thighs
My absence did not matter when your
Tongue did circles
Around Hers
My feelings did not matter
When you kept your
Adventures
A secret
Let your mouth and body
Wander
Down roads I never knew of
You did not even
Tell me
Of the new places you had explored
You had no shame in
Bringing your mouth back
Home
To my lips
But how can I call my body
Your home
When it was only ever
A stop
Along the way to
Someone else.
~~~
I fell as quickly as
The petals on a beautiful rose.
And your words prick
As sharply
As the thorns that grew
Down my spine
~~~
I grow exhausted
Of giving people
My everything
And receiving
No appreciation
Or recognition of my value
~~~
Why is it that
The damage
Never seems to go away
Even on bright sunny days
Where life is going my way
Does the darkness still creep in
Somehow
To remind me it is still there
And probably always will be
Writing poetry has always been an outlet for me and a way that I can make sense of my feelings. I hope that I can continue to be brave enough to share more of my poems with the world and that my words may be able to connect with someone one day. For now, I let chapter one give a small insight to personal feelings of mine. Some of these poems were written years ago, and some written within the last few months.
The poems in this chapter chronicle relationships, break ups, depression; normal occurrences in life that can be difficult for anyone to deal with. Being a person who does not like opening up to others or feeling vulnerable, I have turned to writing as my outlet in expressing these hidden feelings and as a way to better understand myself. I found inspiration in poetry books from the time I was young, reading Shel Silverstein poems in elementary school through my adolescence and into young adulthood. Some of my favorite poetry books recently have been Milk and Honey, The Sun and Her Flowers, (both written by Rupi Kaur) and the Whiskey Words and a Shovel series (written by R. H. Shin).
Poetry is known for conveying powerful emotions and delivering impactful messages, hopefully both of which I have accomplished in writing my own.
About the Creator
Anne & Anamesa
blogger, content creator and mama
find me on socials: @anamesa_anne
Proud Zillenial
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