Leaving

I do not deserve this,

this is not how I planned it to be.

He is always gone,

and I am left alone.

I love him to pieces and yet,

I know I have to leave

I know he has another woman,

and I am the one crying alone at night.

He is so sweet and loving,

but in the blink of an eye,

he becomes a terrifying monster.

He smells of alcohol

and I hardly see him sober

We always seem to fight,

and he leaves the bruises as his proof.

They are my blanket,

one that is so permanent.

He says he has to work,

he never has any time at home.

I am afraid to say anything,

and friends say it is just a phase.

I have no life and family is never around.

I'll pack my stuff in boxes,

what's left from the fire,

and I'll run away,

I'll call the cops,

I'll be a free butterfly,

I'll steal his money and run,

spreading my wings and flying into freedom,

just as soon as the doorway is clear,

and he releases his hands from his grip around my neck