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Keep Trying

A Poem About Cycles

By Rivahn PPublished 5 years ago 1 min read
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“Keep trying.”

Keep trying?

Keep trying! How close to death do I need to be to realize my dream? When does the passion project I’m trying to sell start earning money? When does all the time and energy I put into building good relationships pay off?

I’m scared. I’m scared that I’m going to die and nobody will care. I’m scared that all the pain I’ve experienced will be useless and pointless. I’m scared that those years of my life spent making mistakes and learning from mistakes and making mistakes again will all be for nothing.

My goals are not met and my dreams are unfulfilled and I keep reinserting myself into a cycle of infinite worry and stress where I can see the destination but I can never stop departing! All my choices were all incorrect and any choice I direct to the future will only end in disaster and after I will learn another lesson that I will never use to anybody’s benefit!

My flaws made no one feel superior. My success gave no inspiration. My failures left no examples. My existence left no meaning.

And what if this is but another one? What if this is just me being caught up in a tragedy that doesn’t exist? What if this is me imagining a disaster that stops my progression towards getting something useful done? What if this is me making an excuse for the paradoxical lack of energy and apathy that compels me to find a new and grander distraction from my total lack of problems?

What can I do?

sad poetry
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About the Creator

Rivahn P

Entrepreneur. Author. Autistic. I am blessed with a brain that excels at analysis which means I'm really good at evaluating businesses, compiling researched information, and figuring out the plot of almost any movie from the trailer.

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