I Wonder

I wonder

what grad schools will accept me,

and if I am making the right career choice.

Where I will live,

and if I'll get to travel this world

before settling in one place for life.

I wonder

how many children I will call my own,

their hobbies, their successes, their failures,

and how well I will prepare them for this world.

If we'll have a sprawling green yard,

big enough to play fetch with our dogs

(will we get dogs?)

I wonder

if I will ever grow to like the taste of red wine like my mother,

or if I will forever be your honey and green tea girl.

If you will still make me pancakes whenever I ask for them,

and how many new songs we will discover together.

I wonder

how my story will end, and when,

and if a smile will be on my weathered old lips as the book gently closes.

How much I loved, and how much I gave

and how many lives I was able to touch.

Every little aspect about my future

I wonder about them all.

But the one thing I have never wondered about,

the only assurance in this vast, unwritten existence

is you, my love

and your permanent place, forever by my side