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I'm Okay

I'm not okay.

Here I am, it's 1 AM and my depression inches its way to the surface again, declaring not to be ignored. It crept through like the unsolicited advice from a stranger that manages to break through all of the defenses you've put in motion in effort to be unreachable. Here I sit in this deafening silence that is far too noisy for me to comprehend a single thought as they race through my mind.

I saunter my way down the main pathway that leads to the shoreline. I think about how it would be to take a fistful of sleepers and walk into the water as it swallows me. Is it welcoming? Is it greedy with its engulfing of another entity? My thoughts are interrupted by a vision of everyone sleeping soundly back home, unaware of my absence. I pick up my feet and turn back to the direction I came. I stop for a moment and look back over my shoulder, "Another time." I say almost soundlessly.

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