Deeply anxious
Creepy girl,
Weirdo
Can't sleep
Can’t eat
I'm falling and yet I still bite my nails until it hurts
I feel it for days, every time I try to do something with my hands I am reminded of the dark.
Once,
someone who I thought I'd never see cry told me “nights are hard”
He had sandstone hands and now he is the ocean.
Once,
I floated
During that time when I couldn’t bring myself to sleep in my own bed
wasn't hungry
For three months, maybe
Once,
before I decided that I didn't believe in soulmates,
I wrote in blood
Wrote my own synapses onto the paper,
Wrote so long and hard the pen broke and so I drew flowers all over my skin
War paint
condemnation graffiti
overgrown grass in the backyard
hip bones
Mattress on the floor
printer paper on fire in the sink
Some wounds are less easy to understand like holes in your stomach lining.
There are times when I slip into the in-between
I am February 29 and 3:45am
This is me, not anybody else
Not my grandfather or any blue-eyed boy
I am one glass of wine too many on a Tuesday night
I am night blooming flowers
I am a cigarette smoked alone on the front porch
the changeling, the transplant, the puzzle piece cut just a little bit off kilter
I am crooked smiles and unexpected lack of coherence
Something that sometimes can only be fixed temporarily with hem tape and aspirin
About the Creator
Isabel Siobhan
21 / student / criminology / history / Colorado / improviser / poet / scorpio / spooky girl
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