From the Outside Looking In

She hesitates,

As her fingers playfully dance across the crinkled leather binding of the steering wheel,

The air stifling despite the cool air flowing through the vents,

She feels the stress and anxiety rise within her

Like a fire that cannot be contained,

She is on autopilot,

As buildings and people fly past her on both sides of the potholed road,

She stares off into the distance,

An etched horizon that begins and ends nowhere yet still exists,

Her thoughts cycle,

Fluttering like the wings of a butterfly desperate to get out of its cage,

Someone speaks but all she hears is a mumble,

A whisper,

Something lost in the waves of her silent contentment,

She wonders,

What right looks like and how wrong would feel,

She's pressing the gas pedal,

It slowly compressing beneath her foot,

While the engine roars like a lion beneath the hood,

A simple relation to what she feels inside,

A desire to be free from the shackles of organized religion versus inner peace,

A ball and chain weighing her down,

A heavy burden,

A cross to bear,

She smiles and continues flowing through the motions,

Like a creek bed refilled after a storm,

Through monstrous conditions, replenished, made new,

Eroding the rock from before her throughout time...

How she got here is a forgotten memory,

A marathon run and never stopped,

Miles logged with disregard to committed agreements,

The only thing she knew how to do.