Frenzied Curls, Broken Hearts

after the storm has subsided,

the chaos had finally ceased,

I came home to myself

I lay me down

flatten out my frenzied curls

I wipe my tears

I hold myself

I warm my toes

I soothe my cries

I steady my breath.

I remind myself of my worth

I repeat these words

& drift into the first stage of healing

I am enough

I am enough

I am enough

-

I found the remedy

was in forgetting

I found peace in the

vacant spaces of my memory

the world told me

to remember,

to recall,

to recite,

every detail of a night I told them I wanted

to reverse

to refrain

from reliving

it all.

all I desired was

to return

to the comfort & quality of my soul

that had been tattered & shattered

because of a man with loose words.

he dangled sugar-coated compliments

cut-throat, empty promises

his words like a loaded gun.

I stood strong in front of him

braced myself for

the expected danger of being in his presence

of breathing in his air.

I became stuck in a violent cycle

of self-deprivation

of self-depletion

of bearing the crushing weight of his existence

of dealing with the starvation of his attention

I could no longer stand in front of him

I could not even stand in front of my own reflection

so I came home to myself

to ease the pain

to heal my wounds

to slowly dissolve

any last memory of you.