Dying Dreams

Here I am glazed with a sense of self pity words cannot describe

I see the wear and tear of my financial rut in the bags under my mom's eyes

I always say going out to eat with friends would be nice but the truth is that $15 could be used so much more conveniently, otherwise

Recently I haven’t even been able let out a needed cry

I feel as if my own feelings aren’t even mine

Numbness settles and I tell myself I’ll be fine

But being surrounded by success stories makes me feel less than aligned

I’m starting to think I’ll never get what I want out of this life

Of course I should give it another hardy try

Fix my wronged, what I gave up time after time

But am I really capable of managing that compromise?

Working minimum wage from 9-5

Get my money right and my path should form a straighter line

Well here I am with more money and I’m doing what I like

But it’s not enough, I’m still in debt from my past lives

Never have energy for my passions, it doesn’t feel right

Somethings missing and it’s something I need to find

There’s no way I’m going to to continue me if i always feel this confined

I know my purpose but how do I make it reach others minds?

I’ve stopped writing as much because no one cares what’s within the rhymes

I should do it for myself but I lost touch with my inner child

My dreams are dying and all I can do is lay their corpse to rest

Reality is settling and I’m trying to be responsible at best

Yet there’s still parts of me that can’t consume the fact

The fact that this life we lead can only be in tact

With money and stability, you will not lack

Some of life’s finest things, and you’ll get full respect

But the things I want to do, the things I plan to conquer, take risks and bold moves

For a while it’ll put me under

May seem crazy to you but insanity will get me numbers

Eventually I’ll have an audience that I can inspire to help others

All I want for myself is to teach people that we have each other

Whether my voice is heard through writing, videos, posts, or painted colors

I need more to listen, need more to discover

Life is not the beautiful thing, love is what we need to uncover

Money will bring you things but what gets you through the days is the fire you must not smother

Let it burn brighter, we are all brothers

Acceptance, desire to equalize us all as lovers

Commonality will no longer suffer

My will to live is left to us becoming one with each other