Distance Won

I went home yesterday

With a blank stare on my face

I look back and I see my trace

Where am I and where will I go

What's my future that's full of hope

I'm thinking hard but i wouldn't know

All these thoughts are controlling my mind

But then I hear a voice so I turn to the side

It said don't worry, you're one of a kind

So I go back to my problems

That I want to unwind

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I try to act all tough but I honestly care

When in reality you weren't even there

Yea, I know I'm still living in the past

But that was only 'cause you were all I really had

Honestly when I lost y'all I lost my smile

When was the last time I felt good

Well it's been a while

Y'all were the reason why I'd go to school

Yea y'all did me wrong at times but it was all cool

Maybe I'm valuing y'all more than I probably should

I thought y'all loved me too but then again I wasn't sure

'Cause right now it feels like I'm fighting for us alone

Now you tell me, is this really how friendship goes

This distance between us makes me think i was better off back home

But it's my future we're talking 'bout here

I had to take the long road

If it was on me, I would've picked both

~~~~~~~~

Seeing it now, God was right after all

Even if I stayed it would've been a long haul

I would've stayed the same

And you would totally change

Seeing the person you are now and what you've became

The new you and me as friends? now that would be strange

I finally realized my effort is futile

Giving myself false hope now that was fatal

'Cause me trying to keep our friendship the same was just a battle

But I now know that the truth is brutal

When you move away from your friends you loose your title

~~~~~~~~

Alright then I give in I won't try anymore

If hope is my living room, i'll walk out from the door

If you don't desperately want me what was I fighting for

That's it I'm putting an end to this solo war

~~~~~~~~

But before I stop I wanna ask my self something

Why did I try so much

Did I think it was all or nothing

Or was I just scared of loosing all my friendships

Maybe I was just scared, scared of being lonely

Maybe that's why I kept you regardless of what you did to me

'Cause from your side, our "friendship" looks fake to me

But I'm done with this shit, I'm gonna let things be

I'll try to change myself, not now but sure slowly

You happy distance? you've won, now here's your trophy

I'll be laying low but if you wanna talk, you know where to find me

But just so that one thing's clear

I'll never ever regret our past few years