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Disjointed

I'm almost here.

I should

I should be

I should be listening


This is important

This is something I—like

This is something I—want

This is good


So why

So why can’t I

So why can’t I smile

So why can’t I smile for real?


Why am I

Why am I—gone?

Why am I—drawing on myself?

—On the table?

—On everything in sight?


Why am I talking rubbish?

Why am I looking down?


I should be listening

But I haven’t been here for days

And I’ve stopped trying

And I’d like to start

I’d like to start trying

I’d like to start being


But I’m here

But I’m here enough

But I’m here enough to hang on


Marker-stained and irritating


Sounding mad

Going mad


I will get up when I’m meant to get up

I will walk where I’m meant to walk

I will try

I will try to feel good

I will try to be

I will try to be good




I will hang on

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Disjointed
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