Disappear

My heart started to beat again on that rainy night in July.

When you saw into my eyes.

When you made me wonder why I've been so broken.

Why go through so much just for it to end?

Losing my best friend.

You say nothing has changed,

but they definitely are not the same.

I'm trying to find what we lost at the bottom of a vodka bottle.

I push the throttle but I always stall out when I reach your memory.

Loving you is my greatest enemy.

Loving you is two Klonopin and an end to me.

Loving you is...

should it hurt to love you?

You said forever.

You said forever,

but now it feels like never.

You said forever,

but I guess forever was severed.

Together in these wicked games we play back and forth with each other.

You pretend that you care,

when I am the one who is smothered.

Covered by your broken truths and empty promises.

When all of this is just for your amusement.

You use this to change the game.

Break the sane just call out your name.

If I disappear tonight,

would it make a difference somehow?

If I weren't here tomorrow,

would it turn your world upside down?

What if the moments we have blow away

with the passing of time?

If I were cast out in the shadows,

would it bring you to the ground?