Diamond Tears

I called you today

As I do when I'm grieving

You didn't pick up the phone

Your robotic voicemail

Brought me more tears

Because you're not there

You reach for me

Here I am

I reach for you

I grope in darkness

Your tears are soaked up

By my chest as I hold you

My heart takes them in

Transforms them

Into diamonds

For you

I give them back to you

With comfort

With love

With beautiful words

I heal you

But

My tears fall through empty air

Hit the hard floor below

Nothing to catch them

Nothing to transform them

Into something more

Beautiful and valuable

Then they were before

I've begun collecting

Your tear-shaped diamonds

I haven't been giving them back

Like I'm supposed to

My heart transforms them

Into something more than they were

But I keep them

And crush them to dust

In fists of bitter heartbreak

I mix that diamond dust

Into a paste

A salve

An ointment

I try to use it to treat my wounds

That your absence has inflicted

But it infects them

They fester with sickness

My blood runs black

With a cancer

With death

Your diamond tears

Are killing me