Darkness

I see you void:

you dare sink me in the darkness of Lloyd,

Yet your attempt disregards your social status

and you fail to realize how this darkness you are trying to assemble me in, is only making me ever more eloquent and poetic.

I tried to forgive myself for thinking serendipity would come.

And when it never did, it felt like the whole world was crumbs

and all I was trying to do was eat feelings to survive.

Because mine were gobbled up by you.

I was reckless enough to believe your feelings were acclaimed by a youthful boy.

Disclaimer, you were a monster bargaining for my love and there you sunk brainwashing mirages of hope inside my sponge-like brain.

My brain now contains small traces of us.

A screenshot of that smile while you kissed me, the texts turned into kisses, things I could never save in a document,

late-night promises,

runs up the hills,

views and underwater, goofy smiles,

emails and old-fashioned letters,

taking original pictures

that made people question if we were ever actually together.

Laughs and hiding behind the pillow

scared of a stupid, horror movie that now

I never want to watch again.

Seeing you almost every day without any thought that that day would be our last.

now

Monday is all that I look forward to.

because I know that school and work and stress will get my mind off of you.

but when Friday comes once again

I can't help but think if this is the weekend

that I will see you in time again.