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Asperger Stigmatization

I never asked for this.

Living with mental illness isn't easy. You stigmatizing me for it doesn't help. 

Fragmented, I felt.

Like someone just picked me up

And bussed me straight onto concrete.

Did God do that to me?

I never asked to be born with such an infliction

that made me a dummy for children

to take their feelings of inferiority out on.


I never asked to be born with such an infliction

that held me back from getting the most out of my romantic relationships.

Not to mention the fact it soured my bond with my family at home.

Imagine coming home every day getting told off and being

called all sorts of derogatory names—

just because of their own putrid dissatisfaction with themselves.


I can imagine my momma’s frustration

because she had to deal with an emotionally wrecked child.

Did Momma ever wish she could have traded sons with someone else?

I never asked for any of this


No.

No.

No.


It prevented me from catching social cues and mingling in groups.

Although in time I was the one usin’ this affliction as a scapegoat to hold my own self back.

I am guilty of that

I know, I know

Crucify me for it.


Still, though I went about my life

with this affliction and those who knew of it

used it to label me as a diseased pest.

Someone who is too sick for society

A retarded kid with no dad who's gonna end up just like him

Says my classmates when I was eleven years old.


I’m sorry, god

I’m sorry

I ain’t holy enough

I’m sorry, god

I’m sorry

I don’t push myself enough


Just send me to hell once I die

I’m sorry, everyone

I’m sorry

savage writer was never meant to exist.

I created him for a reason

I ain’t wanna feel no more pain

So I turned it into anger.


I’m sorry, my ex-loves

I’m sorry

I didn’t mean to badmouth you all

Wait, hold up

I take that back.

Yes I did.

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Asperger Stigmatization
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