A Renner Christmas Night

It's Christmas Eve now, and Johnny's in the back

Getting frustrated with the Christmas wrap.

He hates wrapping presents if they're not in boxes,

But he and I both know that in this case you gotta.

The three boys are all sick coughing up their lungs,

But not too sick to ask when their presents will come.

There's garland on the wall, doesn't seem like much,

But it's one of the few things the kids couldn't touch.

The tree's in the corner all broken and naked

After the kids pulled off all the balls just to break 'em.

I'm surprised my angel's still on top of the tree

When the garland and lights are off almost completely.

The stockings are hung way up high on the wall

Where the kids can't get to them and ruin them all.

Christmas shows run amok all over the TV,

But the boys would rather watch Spongebob or Chucky.

The ham's thawing out, baking it won't take too long

As long as the oven decides to turn on.

Even Maxie got presents from good old St Nick,

A new toy to chew on and some fresh porkhide sticks.

No white Christmas this year for our family,

Instead, it's more like spring, almost fifty degrees.

Were just about broke, this Christmas ran us dry,

But that's okay, because this is still a happy time.

So keep your big Christmases, more power to you,

But this is the way that us Renners do it.

Merry Christmas to everyone, wherever you are,

I hope your holiday shines as brightly as ours.