He told me 'i wish I could have your mind set.' and I just knew what to say. I had to work for this shit, I printed what I wanted to believe on my skin so every time I held my head in my hands I would be reminded of this shit. I had to tell myself the little things were important before I believed them. I had to tell myself the situations I was in and the things I felt wouldn't last forever even though I was absolutely 100 percent positive that they would. I had to work for this shit. Waking up in the morning with a tear stained face and still putting on that first song of the day. Sitting in bed I will rub the black mud from around my eyes I wore so prim the night before and tell myself this is a new day. And some days, I will say it over and over and over, cause this way of thinking didn't come easy to me. I had to work for this shit. I had to want it. And I didn't for so long. I didn't want to be strong I wanted the world to accommodate me. Can I just get a break I would scream so often but the sound just bounced around in my head cause who would I scream it too. I had to work for this shit guy. I had to want it. You are stronger then you think. Everyone feels this way. Even though I thought I was alone I chose to look around the world I blindly lived and see it for the raw and interesting thing it was. The way the clothes lay on my skin.. I had to work for this shit. I had to want it. And I told myself that I didn't give a fuck about anything but I gave a fuck about everything way too much. And I forgot about all the abilities I had and how strong I was. I had to work for this shit. And I had to want it. And telling myself all of these things MADE me want it. I looked around and let go. And in letting go I gained more control over myself then I ever thought I would. Cause I'm working for this shit I fucking wanted it. I began to see within what was my hell between work and home and bills and keeping up with relationships when I no longer thought I needed friends, the sky was always out. And the walk home took more time but felt shorter if I stopped to sit on the swings. You gotta work for that shit my dude. Even during those times you don't want it. I was in your shoes. The world will always be hard but you are so much stronger than you think. You were literally made for this world.
About the Creator
Alisia Falise
I study sacred geometry, self help, art, pretty much anything expressive that will lure me to continuously grow and learn.
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