A Letter to My Body

I viewed distantly,

remorseless,

as your skin drained of multi-color,

as your muscle was burned off.

Your stomach dented in as if

the demon carved out a place to stay,

and your legs grew too anemic to walk.

I cursed you, for being what you should.

As you fought to gain

some health,

I extracted it from you out of

resentment.

I pushed

I pushed

without fear.

Weakness made you cold -

and I tortured you,

for I hated the shivers you gave me.

I killed you,

tender bones,

so I could be as light as air.

I robbed your life luster.

I possibly robbed you forever of obtaining

such euphoria.

Though what I fear most,

is my daily temptation to discard your

worth again.

I cry in deep remorse,

long after I've starved you away,

from watching your attempts to revamp

and fail due to malnourished ligaments.

You suffer the casualties;

cursed with symptoms you never had

before -

every physical pain enclosing the places

I should have loved

though instead I loathed.

I have failed comprehending

why you haven't given up

on this human who has done nothing

but break you.

***

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