9/17

I’m seeing my birthday

Everywhere.

It’s just a day baby.

NO

IT’S

NOT.

9/17

I can’t get away from it.

You can’t read

The future

And if you could,

Then why can't it be you

winning the lottery?

She tried to go to bed,

But every night

She would have another

Panic attack.

I thought,

It was all

In her head.

We would have arguments everyday

Over it.

It was driving both of us

crazy.

I told her to go see the doctors.

She really didn’t want to.

She hated them.

They misdiagnosed people all the time.

They were fuck ups

Just like the rest of us.

She knew it.

She also worked

At a pharmacy

And would see people

Hooked

On all sorts of medication.

She wanted to be the last person

On earth

To take any unnecessary

Drugs.

Go to the doctors!

I will,

Only if you

Get rid

Of these damn spiders.

They were another problem.

Every night

Before we went to bed,

She would make me check

Under

And all around the bed.

No spiders here.

U sure?

She would always ask.

It would always annoy me.

But I did it anyways.

Because that’s what you do

When you care

For someone.

U think they’re

Listening to us?

No don’t say that.

It was a nice joke we had.

Something bright

To pass the time

Before the inevitable

Would happen.

Sometimes,

She would wake me up.

I can’t breathe.

I’d rub her back

And try

To calm her down.

Eventually,

She called the doctors.

She had to.

It was only getting worse.

The doctor said

I’m perfectly healthy.

That can’t be.

She said so.

They are running tests

Just to be sure.

After that,

She grew more fearful.

One day,

We were arguing.

It’s gonna be alright.

No it’s not.

9/17 is coming up

And I still can’t sleep,

My heart is acting funny…

In the middle of her frenzy,

A black spider

Crawled

onto the bed.

She screamed

Like she was being shot.

It crept away.

I thought you were checking

For spiders?!!!!

Truth is,

I was,

Just not very

thoroughly.

I was tired

And didn’t think

Nothing

Of it.

I told her

To take a sleeping pill

That night.

She did,

If only,

Out of pure exhaustion.

When I woke up,

I began rubbing her back.

She loved that.

It was her favorite thing about me.

There was no reaction.

Usually,

She let out

A small moan.

So I pinched her.

She absolutely hated that.

Still,

Nothing.

Baby you ok?

Time to wake up!

I turned her over.

Blood trickled down

Her mouth.

I could see spiders

Crawling

Out of her.

They had pieces

Of what looked like

Her heart

In their mouths.

I picked up the phone

To call 911.

I saw the date

On the phone.

9/17.