4:58

It's funny how you can live in a home full of people

But privacy is nonexistent

The definition of alone time is sleep

Besides all that you still feel alone

You can say it's either depression, over-thinking, or simply loneliness

But I try to not feel alone

Try to not feel like a deep dark hole in an abyss of continuous deep dark holes

Try to not feel like a staircase that is narrow and never ending. Try to not feel like nothing

But it's hard not to feel like nothing when nothing always lingers in your mind

Nothing is like a sharp deadly turn on a rainy day

Nothing is something

Nothing is everything

Nothing is me

I try to surround myself with smiling faces but somehow they make me sadder

Sadder because I wonder what they're so happy about

Wonder how they do it

Wonder how they don't feel like nothing

People say fake it 'til you make it

But how can I fake something that made me

You might ask what made you, now let me tell

A pinch of depression, a sprinkle of anxiety, a teaspoon of lip, a cup of fat, and a gallon of blood and tears

People might look at me and say it's not that bad, other people have it worse

But having a vapid mind is pretty bad, and kind of worse

I realize that people I know, the close ones

Will never truly understand what I go through

Neverending thinking, never-ending planning, plotting, remembering, reminding, never-ending.

But I try not to feel alone

I try not to feel like nothing

But nothing is something

Nothing is everything

Nothing is me.