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My Own Worst Enemy

The mirror doesn't lie...

By Alisha Nichols-WilkersonPublished 6 years ago 1 min read
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For fear of rejection

I hide what is truly in my heart

And to make sure it does not happen

I will keep pushing them away

Too scared to take a shot

Wanting so badly to say stay

But I just cannot get the words out

And I hate to be alone

It sucks no doubt

To come into an empty home

So I try to fill that void

By surrounding myself with people

And what better place than the bar

Ohh boy wasn't I the fool

These past few months have changed me for sure

My thoughts and feelings

Are constantly at war

My mind is constantly racing

Trying to fight out my demons

And when I am drinking

My thoughts and expressions

They come out all wrong

Giving people the wrong impression

I end up doing and saying

A lot of things I regret

Come tomorrow morning

But I am back out there

Every chance I get

And it's getting old

I am soo tired

My soul is turning cold

I look in the mirror

At the woman staring back

I do not even recognize

I feel the world coming down around me

As the realization sets in fast

I have become my own worst enemy

My lifestyle has taken its toll

I am done taking chances

So it is time to slow my roll

And start making some changes

My drunken days are done

I am not quitting completely

But I am cutting way down

I do not need to be drunk to have fun

Maybe I will start recognizing

The woman I used to be...

sad poetry
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